Love Letter to My Husband

Love Letter to My Husband

Last week I discussed reflections and goals with my pending birthday. This week, I’m going to talk about my husband Eric. It’s his 55th birthday so I just want to love on him.

I met my husband in 1983 on my front porch when he was 16 and I was 13. At first glance, I thought he was cute, but I had no idea just how much more there was to him. From that very first meeting, I knew there was something different about him. I don’t know if I felt that way because he was a Pisces like me or if it was something else. I couldn’t put my finger on it but from the moment we met, there was a connection.

In high school, Eric would come over to my house in the middle of the night and knock on my window. At first, we would talk thru the screen. Then eventually, I would go outside or let him in my room. We literally talked ALL NIGHT LONG! There were plenty of nights where we would panic because we looked up and the sun was coming out or we both fell asleep and woke up the next morning. How we never got caught can only be described as a “BUT GOD” moment. Because between the neighbors, our parents, and our siblings, we should’ve got busted. This went on for at least 2 years and never once did we get caught. But in those nights, I fell in love with my husband. I’m sure everybody thought it was just puppy love because we were so young, but we knew it was something special. Our SOULS were connected.

39 years later, we’re still connected. My husband is one of the most generous, loving, kind, gentle and wise men I know. Let me break it down for you.

Generosity…. My husband gives of himself, his time, his money, his advice. There’s not too much that you can ask him for that he won’t give. I see what he does for his friends, me and our kids daily. But let me tell you a story of his generous nature with a new neighbor. My husband and I own a CBD store and for months the space next to us was vacant. Well finally a tenant started prepping the area to move in. My husband kept coming home and telling me about the new neighbor. He told me about her business and some of the struggles she was having with contractors, permits, etc. We understood ALL of that because we had some of the same issues opening our store. I suspected my husband was helping out because that’s who he is but I had NO idea the magnitude until we went to her blessing ceremony for her space and she presented my husband with a plaque for her gratitude. Hearing her speak on how much my husband helped her get her space ready for business melted my heart. I wasn’t really surprised because that’s what he does but it’s always so awesome when I see others witness this in my husband. One of the questions my husband asks himself EVERY MORNING is how can I help somebody today? He literally prays to be able to help somebody EVERY DAY! His mother raised him to ask that question and he instilled that in our children. The way this man gives back to all of those around him is heartwarming. I’m so blessed to be able to witness it daily.

Loving… Eric loves HARD! Me, his kids, grandkids, extended family, and friends. If Eric loves you, he LOVES you! He’s not the lovey dovey type of guy where you’ll know he loves you from being affectionate or anything like that. But he loves by acts of service. There’s nothing he won’t do for the people he loves. There have been countless times when he’s gone to pick up nieces, nephews, friend’s kids from work, school, taking them to practices. He ALWAYS ALWAYS makes sure the kids and I are good before he takes care of himself. I remember one time one of his friends had to be away for an extended period of time. Eric called his wife and told her if she needed ANYTHING to call him. She did and Eric was there for it all. Whether it was money for a bill, cutting her lawn, transporting kids to practice. It didn’t matter. He was there for his friend and their family because he loved them. I know there are countless other stories about him doing this because I live with him. But I’m SURE if I asked around, there are a lot of other stories like this that I don’t know about. My husband doesn’t like to tell folks what he does for others. He doesn’t do it for praise but out of love. And it’s one of the things I love most about him. I love the way he loves not only me, but everybody around him.

Kind…Oh my goodness sometimes I think this man is TOO kind. My kids would agree. They got away with murder with this man. He always said, I’ll give them all the rope they need to hang themselves but once they get there, they have to deal with the consequences. The kids knew it too, so they never let it get that far but my husband was a sucker for his kids. And it’s not just his family. Eric is kind to everyone who he meets. There’s a homeless couple that lives not too far from our store. They come in the store often to get out of the elements, wait on rides, etc. My husband has befriended them. They come in just to talk to Eric, and one even brought in her boss to meet Eric. (homeless and working….that’s a whole other blog). I remember asking about this couple not too long ago because we were going to have some pretty bad weather. Eric said oh they’re fine. I helped them move into their trailer a few weeks ago. I had to ask him to repeat himself because I didn’t think I heard him right. He said, yea one night after I closed the store, I went over and helped them get their things. We loaded it into the back of my car, and I took them to a trailer. I was surprised but not really. This is what my husband does. He is just a kindhearted man.

Gentle…Eric has such a calm and gentle spirit. If you’re ever in his presence, you can feel it. He has a way of just putting everybody at ease. I can be high strung and all over the place and it literally just takes him putting his hand on my back or shoulder and I’m instantly calm. He doesn’t have to say a word. Just knowing he’s there in my presence can calm me. He has this affect on others as well even over the phone. I remember our daughter calling him hysterically crying about a situation. Eric was able to instantly calm her down by just talking to her. He said OK tell me exactly what’s going on? He then walked her through the possibilities and solutions. Within MINUTES our daughter was calm. This happens often when the kids get into a pickle. They call dad. I used to get offended but then I thought about it. It’s better they call him. He has the demeanor to get them calm and to a solution. Whereas I’ll be crying on the phone with them, and nothing will get resolved at least not right way. Lol But he does this with everyone he meets. I can literally see people relax around Eric. He makes everyone feel welcome. His soothing tone when he talks along with his quiet demeanor just lets you feel at peace. It’s awesome to be around because it also gives you a sense of security. It’s nice to know no matter what happens, Eric will calmly get us through it. It’s hard to panic when someone is being so gentle with you.

Wise…My husband is wise beyond his years. He’s been that way since I met him. He has an old soul in that sense. For as long as I can remember, he’s always thought just a little bit differently than others. He thinks 2-3 steps ahead. He has Plan A, but he ALWAYS tells us Plan A seldom works so have Plan B, C and even Plan D prepared, so you don’t miss a beat. This thinking has made us successful as a family. Everything my husband does in intentional. We don’t make one decision about our finances, businesses, or life without him going thru it with a fine-tooth comb and praying on it. His research can drive me crazy sometimes but, in the end, I always appreciate it. Because like my husband says, we never fail because even when don’t succeed, we learn. When we started our business and my husband left his corporate job, he said, I’d rather try and fail than regret not trying at all. He said I can always go back and get a job, but this opportunity may not be around again. He was right. It’s things like this that just make me stop and think. And I love that he passes this knowledge on to our kids, family, and friends, even strangers. I remember when a young man who frequented our store stole a product. He came back in (he didn’t realize that we knew he stole it) and tried to steal something else. Our daughter caught him and called Eric. Eric said put the young man on the phone. Eric calmly talked to the young man and told him to come back in the store in the next couple of days so they could talk. We all laughed because NO WAY was this young man coming back to talk to Eric. Eric said he will and sure enough, the young man came in. Eric talked to him for about an hour. A few of the things that Eric said to him was why would you steal from me when every time you’ve come in here, I’ve been nothing but nice and respectful to you? The young man couldn’t do anything but put his head down. Then Eric said I can call the police, and you’ll have a record. Is that what you want? Is that what you think your family wants for you? The young man said no sir. Then Eric went on to give him advice on what being a man is about, more specifically what being a BLACK man is about. See this was a young African American man and Eric knew if he kept down this path, he could end up in prison. This young man not only sat and listened but thanked Eric and even paid Eric back for the product he stole. I hope this young man realized that he got a lot of wisdom and knowledge that day. He has since moved away from the area, but I’d like to believe that he held onto what Eric told him and made wiser decisions.

These are just a few examples of the reasons why I love my husband. He’s so much more than I’ve written here but for me to capture it all, I’d have to write a book. I have been blessed to be married to him for over 30 years and loved by him for over 39! He keeps a smile on my face and laughter in our home. We laugh so much together. He has a great sense of humor. I’m totally and completely in love with this man. I don’t know what I did to deserve him but I’m grateful for God seeing me fit to be his wife. I can’t imagine my life without him, and I don’t want to. I pray we have many more years together to laugh, love and play. I tell people all the time that my wish for them is to have this type of love in their lives. And that is my prayer for all you who are reading this. It’s a beautiful thing. Be safe, be blessed and be a blessing.